Forever Young

hmm

Saturday, May 23, 2009 ? 0 Atashinchi ?

Ok haha I shouldn't be posting now cos must wake up early tomorrow for open house. But well... I saw wenyun's blog post and erm feels a little guilty? Quotes: "tomorrow is setup already and decorations are not planned yet". Oops! :P

Well actually yesterday before prac I was emo-ing due to someone's comment that made me about what I've been really doing. I realise that sometimes I seem to be really hypocritical and always telling people to do stuff just because I am too lazy to do it myself. I've been using the excuse that I don't have enough energy to put in 100% for everything, but I guess that's not really a valid excuse. Sighz. Luckily my emo-ness only lasted a while. But well I think leadership positions is a really great responsibility and it is extremely stressful cos you are forever thinking that you are not putting in enough effort but at the same time you are never able to really put in 100% all the time. And then you start emo-ing and feeling guilty because you feel that you have let others down. :( I know for a fact that a lot of people suffer from this. (But I also realise that after repeated times of emo-ing over this my recovery time has decreased...i don't think that is necessarily good.)

Well for open house I admit that I've been quite don't-care-ish and not really planning stuff. But well er I actually planned to chiong last-minute...hmm ok not good excuse. But I knew that we can do it! Cos I kind of couldnt think of anything except for digging out all the stuff inside the storeroom... But I realise tanbo ppl are very creative. The fake popcorn thingy is so cool! :) Tomorrow morning have to go early before open house starts to put out the instruments for display and do final touch-ups. Sadly I still have CO shift in the afternoon, meaning I probably have to stay for nearly the whole day. -_- Dear me will get really bored.

Ok when I am in a good mood I reflect upon things I haven't done well in a not very repenting manner. Then feels guilty. :P Or when I am in a bad mood I start emo-ing. And get into an even worse mood! But anyway I am really sorry that tanbo's discipline was so bad during today's dazu...partially cos I was too lazy to actively control the section. And *guilty face* I wasn't feeling extremely repentant when the lin laoshi was speaking to us about the poor discipline. *blinks guiltily again* Hmm I think I should either put in more effort or if I make up my mind to slack a bit I shouldn't start feeling guilty afterwards, seeing that I already knew the consequences. I am so pathetic.

Whatever I am writing crap in this post! It was supposed to be a sorry post for being so procrastinating and all about CO. But I am not in a repentant enough mood! Oh no must go sleep now it's 1am already! Otherwise tomorrow can't wake up for opne house then will die!!!!!

Boo I really shouldn't be in deco comm. I think I am so uncreative! All I do is either boring or weird! Luckily there are actually creative people in CO who can help. :)

Labels: co, open house